The thunder in your ears

When you left,

You thought I had a lot of apologies to do.

But I definitely do not.

I am not sorry.

I’m  not sorry that I am taking care of me.

I won’t apologize for cutting you out of my life when being around you is damaging.

You are the poison in the air I breathe and I will not apologize for my gas mask.

You told me I wasn’t pretty.

You’re right.

I am not your idea of pretty. You believe it is numbers.

That if I weigh more than 130 lbs I should not wear leggings or crop talks.

I’m my definition of beauty.

I like my dimples and blue eyes.

I think they dazzle.

I’m not a number.

No I am a rainstorm.

My laugh is the lightning across your sky and my thighs are the thunder in your ears.

I am not sorry.

I’m not sorry that I am a girl.

I am sorry that the words “tampons” and “pads” made you uncomfortable, but I am not going to stop saying them.

Period.

And I am definitely not going to apologize for eating 6 pieces of pizza and not working out after.

But when I slow down, I realize

Maybe I am sorry.

I am sorry that you left when it got hard.

You forgot that life is full of ups and downs

a piece of coal doesn’t become a diamond without pressure,

and you left just too early.

You and I were always the worst combination.

We were jam and honey

hercules and hades

teenage girls and read receipts

We are not good.

And We never will be.

I guess I am sorry.

Just not in the way you expect me to be.

 

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hi  hi hi hi hi so basically gonna be awol bc I wanna write a book. A poetry book. So most of my stuff will go there. But I just wanna thank you guys, for believing in me. You’re the grandest humans I have ever met. 

-mw

 

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One thought on “The thunder in your ears

  1. Hey! This post couldn’t be written any better! Reading through this post reminds me of my good old room mate!
    He always kept chatting about this. I will forward this page to him.
    Fairly certain he will have a good read. Thank you for sharing!

    Like

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