Hey Reader, how are you? It’s been a while; about three months, maybe more. And for that, I apologize. It was rude of me…to deprive you of my life. So here I go. Remember how a couple posts back I told you about that friend who I got in a fight with and it was a huge problem and yeah. We don’t talk anymore. And I miss her. I wish things could go back to the way they were before..but they can’t. Both of us are too prideful to talk to the other. The problem with that, is that we both are hurting ourselves..and it’s sad. I don’t have many friends reader. Just a handful..a few. My best friend however is my cousin. Taylor. The one living with me. Well she used to live with me. She moved out in July, went back to her family and is going to college soon. I miss her. Reader I remember being so terrified to have her move into my house…honestly I was stressing and now I dont want her to leave. I miss my sister guys. Really really bad. Everytime I see her we have these long huges and I choke back tears because I miss her so much. Is that sad? Yes. Yes it is.
Something Tramatizing happened this summer, and I get to tell you about it. It was middle of July. A saturday to be exact. We were at my aunts house for a family reuinion. The adults were gone, leaving me and my older cousins to babysit all of the children. My cousin Katelyn, who lived in the house had been given the task to sell this boat to this guy for her father. Seemed simple enough..who knew it would turn into something horrid and awful. Because it did. Katelyn has this dog. An old Australian Shephard who doesnt like kids very much. Too bad, my sister Bailey who is three years old, loves dogs too much. Katelyn was trying to pitch the boat to this random dude, not watching the kids. No one really was. Me and the rest of my cousins were inside. Big mistake. A blood curdling scream calls Katelyn’s attention and she freaks. Its Bailey. She’s bleeding a lot from her head and its getting every where. Katelyn freaks, scooping Bailey up and bringing her inside, where I lay my eyes on her. Which was not a good idea. I had only been in this situation one other time when my brother had cut his face on a lamp and was bleeding everywhere and yeah. I have a very mild case of anxeity reader. It only shows up when someone gets hurt, and bam. Before I knew it my sister was sobbing on the counter, trying to hug me but instead getting blood all over my shirt. I was trying my hardest to hold in my sobs Reader. It was hard. She was shaking, quivering, her hands and hair and face covered. I could hardly breathe. The boat guy and his wife rushed up, telling us what to do and how to do it, calling my mother for me. Honestly it was a tender mercy that he was there. A big one. My cousin Katelyn was hysterical, on the phone with her dad. She felt so bad…while me? I was a mess. When I get upset, scared or hurt, I joke away the pain. I become the most sarcastic person ever so I dont cry. While Katelyn was sobbing, the boys went upstairs and it was just Me, Mirah (17) and Sydney (14) They were angels. Kept me calm when all I wanted to do was cry. It was terrifying. Once the bleeding and my sisters crying had mostly stopped, we turned on frozen to keep her calm while we waited for my Mother and Uncle. They arrived forty five to fifty minutes after the bite, and I was so glad they were there. I didnt have to be the adult and I could cry to my mommy all I wanted. I felt better. Bailey got six stitches that day. They were gone all night. The next day when I saw my sister again, I was a mess. Her entire face was swollen..she didnt even look related to me. It freaked me out reader. It really did. She’s alright now, still loving dogs like no other. We arent sure why Gus had bit her..we do know that he was provoked..but for the exact reason, no one knows. I’m alright. I can’t go near Gus, but thats ok. I never really liked him that much either. I mean, I like him..but I never played or showed him any affection. He was just..there.
My aunt and Uncle also visited reader, and I just wanted to share with you a quote my uncle told me. It’s his own words. His own thought. I really liked it. “You are not on this journey to change your worth. You are here to change your behavior. Your worth is perfect. Your soul is perfect.” -Royce Woodhouse I dont know why this quote means so much to me, but it does. It means a lot. Thanks for letting me dumb all of my crap on you reader. You’re amazing.
-Love,
Morgan.
Ramblings 